The flood of posts looking back on the past year inspired me to write one of my own. It won't be that cohesive as I didn't start this year with any particular goals. I tend to focus on the next goal at hand which often does not line up with the calendar year.
I think the unintentional theme of this past year as been independence. As someone who has some codependent tendencies I had to do a lot of work to feel comfortable in situations where I was operating solo. I still took many trips with my partner Spang but there were some key trips I took without her that helped clarify some of my internal struggles.
100 Trad pitches
The one thing that became a huge focus for me this year was climbing. I realized a huge weakness for me in climbing was feeling dependent on my climbing crew who are stronger climbers than I am. I tend to let them take the lead on trips and I realized this felt restrictive and was hindering my growth as a climber. This lead me to set a mileage goal for lead climbing. I set out to lead 100 trad pitches by the end of the year. This would shape my year in a huge way. I was shy of the target by 5 pitches due to the quick onset of winter and a sense that the goal had accomplished it's intention; I feel confident being the leader for climbing objectives, or at the very least being an equal partner.
This shaped key moments, like I went to Smith Rock for a clinic and it pushed me farther than I could have if I was with my normal crew. I sent my first 5.10b and then sent a second climb of the same grade onsight. I've lead harder climbs but I've always fallen on them. This is the first set of climbs rated 5.10b that I climbed without falling and it was on a trip I took without my partner or crew.
Mt. Kenya
Something scary I did was traveling as queer in Kenya to climb Mt. Kenya. I have a lot of different privileges on this front but I was worried about my safety anyways. I trusted my friends to keep me safe and it worked out. I learned about when to ask for help and when to turn back, as both Spang and I suffered from altitude sickness before we could tackle the last leg of the journey to the summit. We were forced to concede defeat and retreat to a lower camp. Even without achieving the objective it was great fun to be with friends in a wild place trying something pretty absurd.
Offwidth Training Circuit
To prepare for the Keeler Needle with Spang we did an off-width training circuit including The North East Buttress of Higher Cathedral, The Steck-Salathe, Book of Job, Elevator Shaft and The Twilight Zone . This resulted in us realizing I was not fast enough to make it up our goal route on the Keeler Needle which was heartbreaking for me. It was yet another lesson on when to turn back and accept that you aren't ready yet.
Influencing Work Technical Direction
I felt like I came into my own at my new job this year. I convinced our team to make a radical change of direction for the betterment of the team and company even though it would mean I would not get to work on the technology I joined the company to learn. However, the company really didn't have a good use case for the technology and most likely never will. In the coming year I'll continue to flex this muscle. Technology is no longer the driving force for my career, instead I'm focusing on how people organize and make decisions around technology.
Built a Deck
I built a fucking deck... like one made out of wood and nails and cement. It didn't seem like a huge deal to me but I took a week off after designing specifications for a deck and making a plan for building it. It took eight ~11 hour days to get it done but it got done. It's now a fixture of our household which will be great as we continue to invite friends over for parties. However, the deck will house the massive tread wall project that I'm still working on.
KonMari Method
I started the process of going through the KonMari method and I realized the exercise of tidying through her lens was exactly what I needed at the time. It speaks to the Japanese part of me that loves origami and now I get to do it every day in a way that brings me joy. Honing that sense of joy helped me realize what was bothering me in other facets of my life. It seems cheesy but it really did bring clarity in the rest of my life.
The feeling was similar to when I realized I was trans. A sense of dread that I have to confront the big scary thing now that I realized it had been lurking in the corner the whole time. Similar to my response to understanding I was trans, it took me about a week to process it and then tackle it head on for better or worse.
Independent Trips
Indian Creek
This trip was made last minute as I was struggling to find spring climbing partners and was itching to start making some serious progress on my 100 trad pitches goal. The logistics of getting to UT last minute was a bit hectic but totally worth it. The bivy may have been a bit frosty and I may not have gotten enough sleep, but I forged new friendships and solidified old ones, and started to develop my own relationship to the climbing community outside of my regular climbing crew. It gave me a huge appreciation and love for the community I've chosen to be a part of. It was the perfect way to kick off the climbing season.
Bishop Cragging Classic
I went to the Bishop Cragging Classic solo and had a similar experience to my Indian Creek trip. This is where I learned about the climbing grief fund which I suggest you support if you're a climber or are close to a climber. Death touches our community too frequently for us to turn a blind eye to how it effects us.
Squamish
The big trip and test of the year. The majority of my lead pitches were done during this trip. I had a lot of fun when the MITOC (MIT Outdoor Club) was around but after they left I felt very alone and couldn't dig up any other climbing partners. Once again I was reminded of how lucky I am to be part of a climbing crew. This trip was laced with a lot of emotional complications and I realized that I may not actually want to move to squamish any time soon but it does hold a special place in my heart and I will always return for 2-4 weeks every once in a while. It's just so much type one fun. Next time I'll bring a bouldering pad.
Revelstoke and Rodgers Pass
Traveling to Revelstoke was my first long distance ski trip and my first time skiing in Canada. This last minute trip with Sean and Kate was a great way to kick off the ski season and stress test my ski travel tactics. It also highlighted to me that I haven't flexed my executive decision-making for backcountry trips of any sort, let alone ones that involve avalanche terrain. This winter's focus will be a lot of trip planning as well as devising a decision-making framework for myself when traveling in avalanche terrain.
Friendship
Is magic... sorry not sorry. In the same vein of tackling my co-dependent tendencies I've embraced friendships. We've thrown many house parties inviting friends over to warm our house and share a meal and conversations. I am so extremely grateful for the friend group I've found myself a part of.
Looking Ahead
In climbing I'm leaning into my next weakness: face climbing. I don't have a metric for this other than I aim to have at least 3 hard sport projects and tackle them earnestly over the next year along with general climbing mileage on face centric climbs.
For Skiing I'm focusing understanding avalanche terrain and learning how to ski powder efficiently. I've eaten it one too many times in the backcountry in deep powder which has been more dangerous than I've admitted to myself.
Theme of next year will be Think and Speak Up as I figure out how to communicate my desires to the rest of the world and in turn manifest them.